How to tell someone on a dating site youre not interested

For example, if your dating was solely online, you can send a short email to the guy.

Don't lie to yourself or the other person.

On the other hand, if you went out with the guy on a couple of dates, use the phone or even face-to-face communication, if your relationship was much deeper. Instead, show firmness and compassion by telling him that it is as difficult for you to convey your disinterest in him, as it is for him to hear it. Wish him all the best in finding the right mate. You must put a stop to all forms of contact with the guy once you have told him that you are not interested in him, or in taking the relationship forward. Whether it is by email, phone or in-person communication, you should put an end to every method of communicating with him.

By failing to stop communicating and permitting him to contact you, you will only prolong the relationship and frustrate your initial aim to amicably end it. Email your online guy to inform him of you disinterest in the relationship. Meet Singles in your Area! It ' s better to pull them aside as soon as you ' re made aware of their feelings and communicate your disinterest kindly.

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The longer you wait, the harder it will be for both of you. But we ' re here to tell you, it ' s never a good idea. Agreeing to a date also gives your admirer hope that you might feel the same way, which will only make things more painful when you tell them you don ' t. As a rule, don ' t ever agree to a date that you don ' t wholeheartedly want to go on.

Not Interested in Dating Someone? Just Say So.

It won ' t save anyone from getting hurt, and you ' ll be forced to sit through an awkward evening of forced smalltalk. Number one rule of rejection: In case you haven ' t heard of ghosting, it ' s a method of rejecting someone that involves cutting off all communication with no explanation.

Please do not just go on dates with these women. As a lady who is currently seeking a dude to date, and who is often the initiator in these sorts of situations, I can attest that we are mostly adults who can handle honest rejection so long as it is delivered quickly and with minimal fuss -- truly, it is OK!

In fact, I think dudes I like who reject me as a prospective partner right up front are pretty sweet for having the nerve to just rip the band-aid off, and I have gone on to be good friends with some of them as a result. The only way these women could possibly think poorly of you is if you are rude in declining their invitations, or if you agree to take them out on dates while already knowing you did not want to be involved with them in any way. The fact that you're not romantically interested in them will have to come out sooner or later, right?

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  • You shouldn't try to fake it and ignore your own feelings in hopes that you will be able to spare someone else from discomfort. We will never be able to spare people from discomfort, even if we do everything they want us to do. And the person you would attempt to force yourself to date would notice how hollow your words and actions are, sooner or later. Dropping a quick note with something like "I'm flattered that you'd like to go out on a date with me, but I just don't think we'd make a good match romantically.

    Take care, best of luck! I would respond to someone if I knew them outside of the dating site. I message people sometimes and forget about it pretty quickly no matter how much I liked their profile.

    Walking the line.

    I'm only going to remember you if you message me back. The only time I start to get into someone if is we have a couple of messages back and forth and it looks like we might meet, but that's regardless of whether I messaged first or the guy did. I would be really disappointed if I found out someone went on a date with me out of some sort of guilty feeling of obligation. I message lots of people on dating sites. If every single guy who wasn't into me wrote to explain that I would just cry. Once you've met, it's polite to respond. I hate being ignored when I message someone, so I don't do that to guys that make an honest attempt to reach out to me.

    I was looking at my OKC inbox last night and realized that over the years I had skipped over a not-small amount of messages Some even from interesting people but maybe not interesting enough to date. Thought it would be fun to write back just for the heck of it. One thing that doesn't seem so bad to do is to write a short note back, minimal, kind and acknowledging but fail to invite any follow-up by not asking questions.

    Let’s be real.

    Works for me more often than not, but I might not have OP's natural magnetism. Not very many women in our culture are forward enough to ask for the date themselves for better and for worse usually for worse. If they do, ain't nothing wrong with a straight forward, kind rejection. I'm not interested in that way, you know?

    3 Ways to Tell Someone You Don't Want to Go on Another Date

    Hope you find someone who is! The courage to ask is rare and deserves to be nurtured if only for the sake of the next guy who might appreciate the message. The idea that one shouldn't waste one's time or others' time on dates with folks who aren't perfect matches is kind of silly, too. Go out if you want to go out and don't go out if you don't want to go out. Obligations and expectations on first dates are for the birds. I don't believe in ignoring perfectly friendly people, whether in person or online. They're real people, even if it's the internet. However, it's also really important to be as straightforward as possible.

    As others have mentioned, saying a clear, polite "No, but thank you. Personally, I would preempt the IRL issue. In your profile, include a one-liner along the lines of, I feel uncomfortable dating people I know through friends so don't take it personally if I don't respond for that reason. This gets you off the hook with the least amount of hurt feelings. It seems super weird to me to messages someone you know in real life on an online dating site.

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    If you already know the person, maybe just That said, I think it would be weird to just ignore a message from someone you know and will be interacting with in the future. For those who have emailed you thus far, I would respond briefly with one of the excellent suggestions above. For the future, I would put a notation on my profile that says something like: Match does, but it doesn't stop the truly persistent.

    I honestly think you should go with what's most comfortable, OP. There's a lot of variance between what the other person "might" want, here, and you've stated that you feel uncomfortable just not replying. I do not think you should suck it up and go on dates you don't want to. Rejection sucks, and some people take it more to heart than others. I think "Hey, I don't think we'd be a good romantic match, but let's get together sometime and bitch about how awkward online dating is" or some version thereof is acceptable.

    But there are folks out there who are alright with no response, too. There is really nothing you can do to control how people feel about being told "no. I don't recommend doing this for women who have met you offline, because A at some point you may meet or make an acquaintance you might like to get to know in that way; B it can come across as dickish.

    Take that with how ever many grains of salt you like; and C It likely will not stop anyone nor will it prevent someone from feeling some kind of way about it.